Rita's Rants n Raves

Every girl dreams of marrying Prince Charming, or at least someone very close to that description. I was no exception, as a little girl I knew that I did not want to marry a doctor, a policeman nor a fireman, these guys would never be home and I wanted my husband home with me. I had my share of boyfriends, many had even asked me to marry them. The majority of them were jobless so I knew then there was no way I was going to marry a loser. I was wrong! At the age of 17, a Senior in High School I met a man (24 years of age) who was a Marine. I was in the J.R.O.T.C program for my four years of H.S. (graduated second in command, a great honor as far as the military goes) so when I met him for the first time I fell in love. Yeah I know what does a 17 year old know about love. Well let's just say I ended up marrying this creep, had 2 kids, and 5 years into the marriage it was over. The sad thing was that when I walked down the aisle with this creep I no longer was in love with him, I married him because we had a daughter and I felt that I owed it to her for her parents to be married, I know I know I was stupid. I swore then that I was done with men, I couldn't trust them, I had two children to raise on my own therefore I would not have time to date, which was fine with me. One woman who I worked with had told me that when I wasn't looking for a man it would be then that I would find one. I thought she was weird because that saying was weird, but it is one I will forever remember. There was one guy, tall skinny white guy, who worked in the computer room that would change my mind, even though I wanted nothing to do with him or any other man. This guy was very quite and would only say hi when we past each other in the hall. He surprised me one day when he sent me an e-mail. Now of course this was a long time ago so I will write the conversation as I remember it.
M: Hi
Me: Hi
M: you consider us friends right?
Me: sure, why
M: well, I was wondering if you would do me a favor
Me: it depends, what is it?
M: I have a wedding coming up in December and I was wondering if you would go with me as my date
Me: (I don't think I responded for what seemed a long time, but probably about 5 minutes, I was in shock)
M: hello?
Me: yeah I'm here. Well it depends, what day is it?
M: December 6th
Me: I don't know dude, I don't have anything to wear and I really can't afford to buy new clothes right now.
M: If you go with me I will buy you whatever you need
Me: Oh you don't have to do that. Can I get back to you?
M: Sure
So here I go asking people about M, many people we worked with knew him better than I did. All I knew was that he was quite, and polite, and that he dressed to the nines (which I liked). Every single person I talked to said he was a wonderful person and that I should go with him to the wedding. My excuse? He wasn't my type. I liked older men, we were the same age (well I am 7 days older than he is) so therefore he didn't qualify. People kept telling me that "for petes sake you are not marrying the guy, just going as his date to the wedding". So as nervous as I was I said yes, but under no circumstances was this a date, I was just doing a friend a favor, he said ok no problem. So I had him meet me at my best friends house, I didn't want him to know where I lived, what if he was a stalker! (LOL) It was a strange date to say the least, since he was a quite person we didn't talk much during the ride to the church nor did we talk much at the reception, nice huh. It was very awkward to say the least, he went off to dance with the bride and another female friend of his, they took pictures all the while I sat there alone not knowing a soul there. He introduced me to his friend, the bride, who thanked me for coming as her friends date, and said something to the fact of us dating, little did I know she was right. I was glad the night was over, seeing that we had nothing in common, he was a nice guy and I was glad to have done him a favor. Well M had asked me out for dinner soon after the wedding and I don't know why I said yes but I did, this time we had a good time. It was then that he asked me if I would be his date for his cousins wedding. WTF?? Are you serious? I hardly know this guy and I am now his wedding date for all weddings? LOL. I told him that I didn't think so, this was his family I was going to be around, there was no way I would feel comfortable. Once again I don't know why I said yes but I did, and once again I had a good time. I remember meeting one aunt in paticular, she was the grooms mother, and I fell in love with her on the spot, she came and hugged me and thanked me for coming and was introducing me as M's date (urgh). She even had me get into the family picture (what did she know that I didn't that made her want to have me in the family picture?) From that point on M and I were an item, we didn't go out on dates much because I had my kids and they came first, and I didn't want the kids to know about him because I was not sure where this relationship would go. I had my friends set me up on blind dates while I was going through my divorce (yuk yuk yuk) because I had said I was through with men, and here I was catching one on my own without even knowing that I really wanted it. As I got to know M I grew to like him. I could tell that he had family values, his parents had done well raising him. He was polite, such a gentleman, and treating me like a woman (not a possession) a person, something I never got before. I liked being treated like I was special, and it was then that I felt in my heart that this could be the man for me, the man of my dreams, my prince charming. I had a feeling that he was going to propose I just didn't know when and when he did I was floored at the engagement ring he had bought, I had never seen anything like it! I told him that I couldn't say yes until he asked my daughter for permission, I was so worried about how she would feel, as far as I could tell she liked him but did she like him enough to allow him into our lives? Her input was important to me and I didn't want to marry this man if she was not going to be on board with it. I remember M being so nervous, it was so cute, how could a man be nervous talking to a 5 year old? So M came to my house and sat down with her, he told her that he loved her mommy and not only did he want to marry her mommy but that he wanted to marry her and her little brother as well, he wanted us to be a family, he then gave her a ring (with her birthstone), I was in awe that he would do something like that. If I remember correctly I think he got on his knee and put the ring on her finger, I tried not to peek into the room but I couldn't help it. :)

The following year we were married, and I really didn't care if we had a big wedding ( I already had one) but I knew his mother wanted one for her son. M took care of all the wedding arrangements, he had picked out the dress he wanted me to wear and although it was beautiful it just didn't look right on me. The only thing he had nothing to do with was the Mariachi, this man even bought me my wedding shoes!!! He is such an incredible man, how could I not want to marry him? I truly believe that GOD sent this wonderful man into my life, at a time when I was at my low.
Looking back now it is funny because M and I worked for the same company for almost the same amount of time and little did we know as we past each other in the hallways everyday that we would be married to each other one day. In the last 9 years of being married to M we have had our share of laughs, tears, grief and joy, we added two more children into the family and I can honestly say that I am happy, happy that I have finally found the man of my dreams.